Somewhere in this story is the funniest and most offensive joke ever devised. But, it’s a riddle. An enigma. And, probably for the best because I can just tell that any joke about a Nigerian Pollock is going to have a punchline that can kill on contact. It’s like the Kwisatz Haderach of ethnic humor.

“John Abraham Godson, a Polish citizen born and raised in Nigeria, has been sworn in as the first black member of Poland’s parliament. Mr Godson had served as a councillor in the city of Lodz before taking up a parliamentary seat, vacated by a party colleague after local elections.

His entry into parliament has created a media stir in the mainly white country.” – BBC NEWS

I really feel that I should be given some recognition at this point for not leaping into this gaping chasm of racial humor that lies before me. I could throw in a gay rabbi mistaking a pork sausage for a, well, you know. Or something about a Mexican using whiteout to fix mistakes on his computer screen. I could mention a Chinese guy walking through the desert with a car door so he can roll down the window when he gets too hot. But, I’m not. Being this ethnically sensitive is really more of a curse than a blessing. The world simply doesn’t know my pain.

“It is still quite rare to see black people even in the Polish capital Warsaw, Poland’s most cosmopolitan city, the BBC’s Adam Easton reports. Racism is still a problem in Poland, where it is not uncommon for well-educated people to make racist jokes, our correspondent says.” BBC NEWS

Screw this. I’m only human. You people need to stop holding me to such impossibly high standards. This is why I never did well in school. It’s your fault I ended up this way.

“Poland’s most cosmopolitan city”? That’s like saying “Russia’s least drunken and illiterate farming community”. And a “well-educated” Pole is the biggest contradiction in terms since someone said “My, that nice teetotaling Irish boy sure is peaceful and levelheaded”.

What business does a nation still trying to figure out how to screw in a light bulb have picking on a black guy? At least he speaks in complete sentences. At least his country wasn’t fooled by a bunch of German soldiers marching backwards so they thought they were going and not coming. And you pretty much are Germans anyway which would explain your blatant racial hatred.

Well, there you are. Happy now? Everyone probably thinks I’m a complete racist now. This is what happens when you try to open your heart and be kind to people. Damn you, cruel world. Damn you indeed.



  1. 1 Connie Olkowicz
    January 7, 2011 at 5:28 PM

    Fuck you esshole! Racist! I hoped you die and you leg fall off! You suck shit and make me want vomit!

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