Having been through moving hell these last few days I have to admit I’ve been out of the loop. Well, as far as relevant news and current events. As far as women on the verge of a nervous breakdown who also happen to be elected officials, well, I usually don’t pay attention to them anyway.

Whenever Michele “OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!” Bachmann shows up on TV I just change the channel. If I were interested in impartial journalism I would probably sit and listen to her. But, I’m not. So I don’t. It is possible for someone to be so stupid that there is nothing clever to say about them. Think of it as retard armor.

Last night was a rare, and may I say unexpected, treat. Not since Ross Perot blew a small fortune to hijack the major networks have I ever seen someone masturbate all over a national TV audience on their own dime. Well, when I say “national” I mean “those people”. And when I say “those people” I mean The Tea Party. And I call them “those people” because I still know nothing about them. I couldn’t even tell you how they are different from other Republicans. But, apparently they are because after the official GOP response to President Obama’s State of the Union speech last night, Republican Congresswoman Michele Bachmann went ahead and gave her own response.

Not that the “official” response was even necessary. Just take the President’s speech and scream “NO!” and “JESUS!” every few seconds and that will about sum up their position on most things. But, hey, if the conservative Barbara Streisand wants to give me a close up of her nose job then who am I to judge?

Understandably upset about this is Eric Cantor, the Republican Majority Leader in the House. Only last week did he say in no uncertain terms that Bachmann would not be giving the official GOP response. And I would tend to think that his word carries more weight because he’s the House Majority Leader and Bachmann is just another representative. From Minnesota. Which is a state.

Cantor, who just got his driver’s license this week (right on, dude!) has been trying to keep a lid on the Tea Party in congress ever since they stumbled ass-backwards into the majority last November. Apparently, if “those people” have too much of a say they might make the rest of the party look crazy. Hitler used to have the same problem with Himmler and the whole “maybe we should end the war” wing of the Nazi party.

Yeah, I know. I made a Nazi reference. It’s late in the day and I’m tired. Screw you.



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