There was a time in history when the very idea of a European royal wedding was enough to start or end wars. End or create empires. Sway the fates of millions. Today it’s just a part of the global celebrity industry. And it amazes me that a mere 800 years after they forcibly began stripping the monarchy of it’s powers, the people in Britain still get all gaga over the Royal Family.

“The Archbishop of Canterbury has wished Prince William and Kate Middleton the “courage and clarity” he says they will need to get married in the public eye.

Rowan Williams said of the couple: “William and Catherine are making this commitment very much in the public eye and they’re sensible, realistic young people. They know what the cost of that might be. They’ve thought that through. And because of that they will need the support, the solidarity and the prayers of all those who are watching today.”

He said he wished them “every richest blessing in their life together” and the “courage and clarity they’ll need to live out this big commitment in the full glare – to live it out for the rest of us”. Earlier, the Queen held the traditional Royal Maundy Service at Westminster Abbey, giving money to 85 women and 85 men,” – BBC NEWS

Yeah, have courage to join one of the richest and most influential families in the world. I shall pray for them every day. Seriously, their decrepit DNA is worth billions. So much so that the crazy old bat hands out cash at parties and gives her grandson one of the most expensive weddings in history. Of course I’m sure the novelty will wear off once the paparazzi start going through their garbage on a regular basis. It wasn’t long after Charles and Diana were married that the British tabloids turned on them.

I think if weddings included more heavy metal music and hand-to-hand combat I would be more into them. Instead it’s like being ten again and having to watch an episode of STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE because it was your little sister’s turn to pick what everyone would watch. This isn’t how Conan or Stormshadow would get married. A marriage should be forged in a mutual test of survival and shared suffering.

Speaking of being ten-years-old again, I’ll leave you with this video. It’s the season five finale of the old ABC drama DYNASTY. It’s about eight minutes long but after 90 seconds you’ll realize why this is the greatest wedding sequence ever filmed.



  1. 1 Mata
    April 22, 2011 at 7:22 AM

    How convenient that everyone should die with their eyes closed. Either that or they were bored to tears and already alseep prior to the attack.

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