22
Apr
11

STOP MAKING IT SOUND LIKE A WAR

I like to think of myself as a fairly intelligent person. I know when I read a headline that says “HUCKABEE BLASTS GLENN BECK” it’s just an exciting way to describe mundane political discourse. I know that Mike Huckabee wasn’t actually hanging out the window of a speeding car spraying Glenn Beck’s house with a Mac-10.

And I could spend all morning giggling about how funny that would look. So I’m going to write something quick here and then pretty much go back to doing that. Here’s the actual exchange between Beckabee:

“Beck also compared Huckabee to Arizona GOP Sen. John McCain on his radio show Tuesday, labeling both as progressives, because of Huckabee’s vocal support for Michelle Obama’s anti-obesity initiatives.

“I think Mike Huckabee is the one, if you are somebody who understands progressives are on both sides of the aisle, I think Mike Huckabee is John McCain,” he said.” – CNN

After that withering salvo, Huckabee blasted back.

“But Huckabee, who’s name has been floated as a possible contender for the GOP presidential nomination, took to his PAC blog Thursday to blast Beck in response, saying, “This week Glenn Beck has taken to his radio show to attack me as a progressive, which he has said is the same as a ‘cancer’ and a ‘Nazi.’ What did I do that apparently caused him to link me to a fatal disease and a form of government that murdered millions of innocent Jews?” – CNN

This recent flare up between Huckabeck is, more than likely, a contrived PR stunt to generate excitement amongst the conservative base of the GOP going into 2012. All the more reason to use violent and militaristic language in the headlines. And you know it’s officially an election season when Nazi references make their first appearance.

In all fairness to the news industry, it’s probably hard enough getting attention with action-packed language as it is. And this is the lamest smack talk ever. What’s more, I’m sure my own life would sound downright goddamn exciting if I just changed the way I described it to people.

Yesterday, for example, I took fire from Visa for not paying my bill. I reloaded and blasted back with a totally bullshit story about the post office near my house being shut down because of an Anthrax scare. Then, my wife came home and took aim at me because of the laundry pile in our living room which had been there for like two weeks. I returned fire by pretending to have early Alzheimer’s and crapping my pants.

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