I don’t talk a lot about the Tea Party on this site. I actually feel that there is very little to be said about them, despite how much ink and airtime they get in the media. Like American Idol or The Pope they get more press than they should. What’s more, their fifteen minutes are almost up and I’m really not interested in helping to prolong it.

On the other hand it’s another relatively slow news day. And since they are the political equivalent of a redheaded stepchild I guess it wouldn’t hurt to put on my wifebeater, get stinking drunk and take out my frustrations on them with a leather belt and a sock full of nickels.

“Born in the days after Obama took office in early 2009 in a wave of conservative anger at corporate bailouts and hefty government spending to stem the Great Recession, the Tea Party movement has come a long way in just two years. After failing to halt the passage of Obama’s health reform bill, Tea Partiers staffed phone banks, knocked on doors to get out the vote and played a major role in gaining 63 seats for the Republicans in the 2010 elections.

But now more than ever before the full force of their ire is directed at the Republican Party establishment.

Dozens of interviews with Tea Party activists across the country paint a picture of a conservative movement whose members gave the Republican Party in Washington a chance to prove it was serious about fiscal responsibility after years of running up deficits under Obama’s predecessor George W. Bush. And many Republican politicians promised to uphold the Tea Party’s central tenets — constitutionally limited government, lower taxes and the free markets.” – REUTERS

It’s interesting that they bring up George Bush (yeah, that one). Where were all these angry people when a white redneck President was jacking up the federal debt to historic records and expanding the size, scope and intrusive powers of the government to unparalleled levels? And why have they only now voiced their concerns now that a black man is in office? I’m sure they have an answer to that one but, in all honesty, listening to it would seem morally wrong somehow. And I have to set a good example for the sake of my children.

I’ve also gotten tired of these people getting angry when you point out that they are a bunch of hateful white people. Taxes, limited government, free market, blah blah blah… you can put all the pretty dresses you want on that one but it still has the bulging Adam’s apple and five o’clock shadow of a movement for people who just don’t like black people.

I keep hearing that calling them racists is just a “lazy” argument. No, my friend. “Lazy” is the cops giving me a speeding ticket instead of getting off their asses and putting bigger numbers on all the speed limit signs. What you’re doing is actually called “bigotry”. And my calling you bigots is what is commonly referred to as “stating the obvious”.

And what I’m about to do right now is called “masturbating”. And what my 20-year-old neighbor is about to do is called “screaming in horror and calling the police because there’s a naked man tugging it in his living room window while pointing at her and mouthing the lyrics to KILLER WOLF by Danzig”.



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