Normally, I try to avoid simple name calling on this site. You don’t need me for that and it is, after all, the cheap and lazy way to get a laugh. Rather, when I state that Paul is a “jackass” I am aiming to prove that he does in fact meet the definition commonly applied to the term “jackass”.  What’s more, I think that picking on Paul is too easy in most cases. It’s fun, don’t get me wrong. But, unnecessary. But, what the hell. I like fun as much as the next guy in line at the courthouse paying his fine for Indecent Exposure.

For starters, here’s how WEBSTER’S DICTIONARY  defines the term:



1. A stupid person.

2. A male ass or donkey.”

There are many arguments which could be made that Paul fits the first definition, although I find “A stupid person” to be far too broad and vague to accurately describe him that way. As for “A male ass or donkey” well, I’d have to have access to his DNA to know for sure. Based on his appearance I would actually argue that he is some kind of Seahorse or even an Ostrich.

However, the definition of “Jackass” as found in my very own GREELOPEDIA is a bit more specific and much more appropriate in this case:

“JACKASS – noun

1. One who speaks publicly on topics about which they have no experience or understanding.

2. One who happens to be born into already wealthy and prosperous circumstances but believes that their financial situation is somehow due to their own actions and expertise.

3. A member of a sociopolitical movement comprised of the wealthy yet which claims to be “grassroots” and representing the “average person”.

4. Someone of diminished or nonexistent mental faculties who nevertheless serves in a position of authority (See also REAGAN, RONALD and YOUR BOSS AT WORK).

             *While not necessarily denoting stupidity or retardation, the speech and behavior of the Jackass can accurately be described as “stupid” or “retarded” (See also SOUTHERNERS, BANKERS, SOCIAL CONSERVATIVES, THE TALIBAN, TEENAGERS).

5. A “jerk”, “asshole” or “dick”, i.e. one who derives pleasure from hurting or taking advantage of others (See also BUNDY, TED and CHENEY, DICK).”

So what brought this about? I posted video yesterday on the Magnus Greel Facebook page of Paul making a statement which… aw, hell, let’s just let him speak for himself. I don’t speak Moronics so my translation probably wouldn’t be accurate anyway.

In a nutshell, a man who has never known poverty in his life (because his dad is a rich Congressman who does lots of math) is suggesting that the lack of food in your fridge, heat in your home and money in your bank account is actually some kind of hallucination. Or something. I don’t know. The problem with the modern conservative movement is that the more you actually take the time to listen to these people the more damaged your brain becomes.



0 Responses to “RAND PAUL IS A JACKASS”

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