14
Oct
11

THE WEEKEND WORD: LAZINESS

I got up extra early this morning to get back in the habit of pouring through the news of the day. As I said in my piece yesterday I’m trying to get back on the horse here and post every day. I’m also trying to get back into the habit of not smoking the resin from my pipe when I run out of pot. Which is kind of funny because the very first story I saw this morning was about pot. Well, to be accurate, it’s about how retarded our government is when it comes to pot.

“A prosecutor is contemplating expanding a federal crackdown on the medical marijuana industry by going after newspapers, radio stations and other outlets that run advertisements for California pot dispensaries, her office told The Associated Press on Thursday.

U.S. Attorney Laura Duffy made the comments initially to California Watch, a project of the nonprofit Center for Investigative Journalism. They come a week after she and three other U.S. attorneys in California vowed to close medical marijuana businesses they deem questionable and single out people who rent buildings or land to the industry.

“I’m not just seeing print advertising,” Duffy told California Watch. “I’m actually hearing radio and seeing TV advertising. It’s gone mainstream. Not only is it inappropriate — one has to wonder what kind of message we’re sending to our children. It’s against the law.” – CBS NEWS

Frankly, I’m more worried about the message that Miss (Misses?) Duffy is sending to my kids. Specifically, the one in which crystal meth, crack, heroin and abused prescription drugs are laying waste to entire towns and communities and she’s going after pot smokers because she paid a little too much attention to every after school special she saw as a kid. Perhaps also the message that it’s okay to waste billions of dollars in taxpayer money to crack down on something that a majority of Americans now want legalized. Oh yeah, and the belief that the KD Lang hairstyle is still hip. Christ, lady, I’m trying to raise kids here.

Unfortunately for Miss (Misses?) Duffy, actions speak much louder than words and rehearsed facial expressions (seriously, how many hours did she spend in front of the mirror practicing that one?). As I’ve blogged before here and here, most of society long ago accepted marijuana as less problematic than booze or nicotine. But, you know, law enforcement needs a boogeyman to justify their budgets I guess. I thought street gangs and drug cartels would be awesome for that role but, apparently, those guys are too scary and dangerous for today’s police and government attorneys.

Miss (Misses?) Duffy is representative of the main problem currently plaguing federal drug enforcement: laziness. To get a better understanding of what exactly laziness is we must once again turn to the GREELOPEDIA.

“LAZINESS – noun

1) The action of appearing tough or concerned about something (i.e. through the use of public threats and the donning of overly butch haircuts) only to have no intention of actually doing anything about it (See also THE WAR ON TERROR and THE CONSERVATIVE RESPONSE TO THE FINANCIAL CRISIS)

2) Trying to hide your unbelievable failures and complete waste of tax dollars by demonizing a relatively harmless substance and the relatively harmless people who partake in it (See also INCOMPETENCE and THE WAR ON DRUGS)

3) Avoiding contact with actual problem drugs like meth and heroin, as well as the people who make and sell them, because of the risk involved and instead going after hippies, college students and terminally ill people (See also COWARDICE and THE DEA)

4) Distorting, altering or outright falsifying facts about  harmless substances in order to continue receiving an obscene amount of tax dollars to buy cool military shit you have no intention of ever using because  a) you don’t know how and  b) you’d rather sit on your ass all day examining 215 cards (See also “GATEWAY DRUGS” and THE D.A.R.E. PROGRAM)

5) Appealing to people still mentally stuck in the 1930’s who think grass has something to do with voodoo rituals and Negro jazz musicians seducing white women in an effort to rally their support come election time (See also REAGAN, NANCY and THE REPUBLICAN PARTY)”

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1 Response to “THE WEEKEND WORD: LAZINESS”


  1. October 14, 2011 at 11:50 AM

    You can check out some local reaction in Humboldt County, California (which is kind of known for its horticulture) here at the website for SAVAGE HENRY INDEPENDENT TIMES, a personal favorite of mine.

    http://www.savagehenrymagazine.com/2011-10-14/are-you-kidding-me


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