Okay, to completely truthful he wants to be President because he’s rich. And in Conservativeland being rich entitles you to be in charge. God, having to get people to vote for you and actually put forth a coherent and persuasive argument must be such a slap in the face for a man like Mitt Romney! He clearly should just be able to show his bank statement and the grateful serfs of America should worship him and carry him through the streets. Or something like that. Whatever.

Romney’s central argument, and the argument of Republicans in general, is that the government should not be involved in our lives. Unless you’re a woman who’s been raped and finds herself pregnant or, you know, you want to marry another dude or another lady. Or your business depends on government contracts. Or you’re a Republican. Yeah, I don’t try to make sense out of it myself anymore. I’m a little too real for that.

“Mitt Romney went back on the attack here Thursday, lacing into President Barack Obama for not understanding business.

The GOP nominee seized on Obama’s support for a “Secretary of Business” with a new campaign commercial and a fresh line of attack in his stump speech…

…in an interview that aired Monday on MSNBC’s “Morning Joe,” Obama said he would like to have one cabinet secretary oversee sometimes overlapping programs designed to create jobs, boost trade and help small businesses.

“We should have one secretary of business,” the president said. “There should be a one-stop shop.”

Romney suggested that the comment is emblematic of a president who is out of touch and lacks private sector experience.

“Regulators have to see businesses like this as their friends and encourage them and support them. And, by the way, we can’t tax them to death,” he said. “I want to change this dynamic and make business recognize they have a friend in Washington, not a foe.” – POLITICO

I’m just going to go ahead and disagree with Mitt Romney! on this. Big surprise, right? And frankly I voted for Obama (twice now) precisely because he doesn’t understand business. Because I don’t either. And I’m not only proud of that I’m actually kind of smug about it.

Thankfully, however, we don’t live in Mitt Romney’s universe. Or kingdom or plantation or whatever. We live in the real world. And in the real one I am allowed to think for myself and not at the pleasure of my economic betters.

Regulators should not be on good terms with business types any more than police should be on good terms with criminals. And since business types are the ones who drove this country into the toilet I’m thinking that the last thing they should have is a friendly agency charged with policing them.

Look, if you start a business and become your own boss and make your own way I love that. It’s what I want out of life, to be honest. Certainly rather than spend another fucking minute working my ass off for someone else who will only pay me the bare minimum allowed by law. And who likes little boys. But, as I have said many times before, just because you start your own landscaping business or open a restaurant doesn’t mean that you and Mitt Romney! suddenly have something in common.

Personally I want to see regulators kicking down doors at Target HQ and firing tear gas into the upper floors of the Lehman Brothers building. I want to see those ridiculous people at the stock exchange who scream for a living pepper sprayed and dragged away by SWAT cops. Not for any particular reason either. Just because. I think that it would probably be the healthiest thing for them in the long term. But that’ll never happen, of course. We’ll just give them all a pat on the back, a speech about free enterprise and a gigantic check from the taxpayers. Oh man, do I sound cynical? Shit, how did that happen?



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